i am literally the only person in my history class who has been turning in work consistently all year and i just got an email from my professor saying that if i’m not feeling up to it i dont have to bother writing the 18 page final paper he assigned i just have to not tell anybody god is real
For a while i thought you meant that you had to not tell people that god was real.
like all your friends go out and do things and get into relationships and like people that like them back and have fun and do stupid things with their best friends and instead of doing all that you’re just sort of this mildly entertaining thing that people take an interest in once in a while but they wouldn’t really care if it was gone
like you just sort of exist but you don’t really mean anything
I think one of the saddest things is when two people really get to know each other: their secrets, their fears, their favourite things, what they love, what they hate, literally everything, and then they go back to being strangers. It’s like you have to walk past them and pretend like you never knew them, never even talked to them before, when really, you know everything about them.
I used to think that the people who said that you lose your friends when you get a boyfriend or a girlfriend were exaggerating. But now I realize it’s actually true. I know this not because I got me a special someone or whatever you call them, but because I’m that one friend who’s lost everyone to theirs. I know this sounds selfish, forgive me. I usually don’t really mind and I’m actually happy for my friends, but it’s just one of those nights. Sometimes I just feel sad over the thought that, one, I’ve been replaced as the go-to person if they ever wanted to talk about life or catch a movie or get food or just hang out, and, two, I’m left with no one to replace them as they happily move on. Basically I’ve been fired from their lives, and, being the weird little awkward piece of shit that I am, I can’t make new friends to save my life to make up for the ones I’m practically losing. I end up missing those movies, getting fat on take-out on my own, and worst of all, feeling like shit because at the end of the day, I’m all alone and I have no one to cry about it to but myself.